Words Cheap and Dry, Endless Whining

This was making me feel very sad. Until I found this. The Kooky Kwotes!

Before I go on, what must we do to get Goat-Fiend to write more? Is that or is that not the best blog intro you’ve ever read? And how about that for a first entry! Man, someone get this guy a generous helping of laptop with just a smattering of broadband so we can see what more he has to say for himself. Failing that he should probably die tragically so we could all become Jeff Buckley-esque fans, torturing ourselves over what could have been and spending all our money on double CDs of Goat-Fiend coughing in a studio.


So the Cup of the World is finally over. I do confess to a gaping void in my life where Google World Cup updates should be. Anyone any ideas? By the by, I can understand to some extent (with considerable resentment) the fact that most of you DO NOT LIKE FOOTBALL. However, if this doesn’t move something inside you, check for a pulse. It was the last minute of extra time, for crying out loud. It needs sound if you want the hairs on your arms to stand up just right. That goes for you too, Defective Yeti. While your brilliant writing has brought new-found meaning to so many lives (most significantly, mine), maybe give football a break. Call it racism (please. No really, I insist), but those Yankee scumbags are responsible for some very poor writing on the World Cup. Unable as I am to find the non-Defective Yeti articles I’m talking about (oh the ineptitude!) you’re just going to have to take my word for it. Saves us all time, really; it’s not like you doubted me. Let’s just put it down to the fact that I’m writing this two weeks after all the action finished and those articles are well past their sell-by date, hence, freakin’ hard to find. But anyway, back to the Defective one: these two entries will forever remain unhealing scabs on the beautiful elbow that is Matthew Baldwin’s website. Clichéd, jaded and tired points that did not need a new airing.

While we’re on the subject of football (might as well get it all out of my sytem now) what the freaking heck (pardon me) is up with FIFA rankings. I know they’re notoriously inaccurate and unreliable but why is that? Which toilet did they pull their point system from? For example, Germany are in at 10th while England are 5th… Very odd. Inexplicable, actually. And, without even kicking a ball, Ireland dropped from being level with Colombia at 34 a month ago, to 39; while Colombia jump 13 places to 21! Makes sense when you don’t think about it.

This is the point where I’d usually bitch/berate some film I’d seen recently. I went to the cinema yesterday and had a look to see what was on- taking my bus home proved the more attractive option.

yesterday stigmund woke up sucking a lemon

2 Responses to “Words Cheap and Dry, Endless Whining”

  1. jimlad says:

    Oh right, you mean soccor, not Gaelic. Not interested.

  2. ZeZuZoom says:

    Did you hear me yell from Russia when Zidane headbutted that greasy little cheater? I yelled “WHY OH GOD WHY!” But it was in Russian and my keyboard can’t speak Russian.

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